Listening Is Not The Same As Hearing
Most people will agree right away. Hearing seems like the sounds you capture with your ears and listening the part of you focussing to understand what you are hearing. But I'd love for you to take a moment to reflect deeper on this notion.
We are wired with our 5 senses - we see, hear, smell, taste and touch. All of these senses are nothing more nothing less than your tools for perception. Another way to say this, tools for you to capture and translate energy. Hearing is just one of the way how you perceive and translate the energy you receive. Understanding what you perceive as in "making sense" of what you perceive, is when listening comes into place. And if you focus on listening, you capture that this happens beyond hearing, beyond the use of your ears.
Scientists and researches have written a lot about how our brain works as a "head quarter" where your senses deliver the data collected in order for it to be processed. In your brain everything comes together and your past memories, experiences are used and how we project as human beings in order to understand what we perceive. You probably have heard of and agree with the expression: we perceive the world around us not as it is, but how were are. For most people this is what listening is about. But again, I'd love for you to go deeper, and capture the essence of listening. Listening is more than the meaning making machine that our brain is managing.
The essence of listening or what I call one of the pillars of (Self) Dialogue, is where our 6th sense comes into play - there it is again, in case you have read more articles of mine - intuition. If you really want to master listening, its about bringing in your intuition into play.
Every single time you listen you choose to connect consciously with your intuition first. It requires getting out of your mind - rather mindlessness than mindfulness - tuning in and being highly aware and present. You have no thoughts and you clearly are in a receptive mode. At the same time it seems as if you hear more clearly than ever, as if your ears are opening up more. In harmony you are receiving with your hearing senses and intuitively. You feel no need whatsoever to say anything and therefore the space for the other person starts expanding. As a side effect the person who shares, shares more, genuinely and dares to be vulnerable. If you do say something in return, it would naturally be to ask relevant questions or to share your genius insights. This is what I call a dialogue emerges.
So embrace this deeper understanding of listening. And it doesn't mean you'll always truly listen. But at least you are aware when you are and when you're doing less - this means you choose to only hear. People who master listening are perceived as great people to be around with. They know things that not many people don't know. They collect information that has unique value and therefore they can make changes and achieve results that not many people are capable of. Good news: you can learn how to master listening - that's why communication is one of my topics in the Online Group Coaching Session.
Are you a master in listening? What are your experiences with hearing and listening? Leave me a message in the comment section below, I’d love to hear from you.
- W.